|
Frequently Asked Questions
 Undoubtedly, the question we get asked most
often is 'How long
does it take to adopt?'.
 It is difficult to answer this question. Because it is our policy that
the
birthparents choose the family, the time period you wait is mostly a
matter
of how long it takes for you to be selected by a birth family. We have
had
a few 'miracle' placements where a family has been selected within a
couple
weeks of contracting with us. The term of our full contract is set at
two
full years, and we feel this is a reasonable time frame. We also limit the
number of families that we will work with at a time, in an effort to make
sure every family gets a placement within two years. 99% of our families
have gotten their placements within two years time!
Another factor that may affect your wait time is how selective you choose
to be regarding the situations you want to be presented to. For example;
we do allow our families to specify a gender preference, however that will
greatly narrow your path. Many birthmothers do not know if they are
carrying a boy or girl. If this is your choice, you will not be presented to
any birthmother that does not know the gender of their baby. Many birth-
mothers do not find out if they are carrying a boy or girl until long after
they have selected a
family.
What are the advantages to using your marketing services versus running
my own ads?
The cost of "doing it yourself" includes obtaining a toll-free phone number
for birthmothers, and if you are running ads, you really need to be
available
to answer that line 24-hours a day. Secondly, is the time factor. Not
only is
it very time consuming to place these ads, but you must also screen
all of
the incoming calls. Once again, we have spoken with many people who
have
spent not only thousands of dollars, but also several YEARS in this process.
Thirdly, we are committed to not only running professional ads, but also at
handling and screening all incoming calls on your behalf.
Is A Loving Choice Adoption Services a licensed agency?
No. A Loving Choice Adoption Services is
not a licensed adoption
agency. We are an
adoption marketing service, whose sole purpose is to
coordinate marketing
efforts to connect birth families with prospective adoptive parents. Please be
advised, however, that it is within A Loving Choice Adoption
Service's sole
discretion as to the frequency, location, and content of the advertisements,
which will aid in the location of the birthmother/birthparents.
How do I know if you are a reputable service?
Throughout the years, the staff of ALCAS have spoken with many families and
birth families. Adoptive couples as well as birthparents have been comfortable
working with us because of our ability to handle the difficult
decisions
involved
in placing a child. ALCAS will be happy to share the names of attorneys,
agencies, and adoptive families for reference. At one time, all the Adoption
Coordinators at A Loving Choice Adoption Services were without
children. We
understand the emotional ups and downs that it brings and we are committed
to provide you with professional service as well as emotional support, from
one adoptive parent to another, from the heart.
Will A Loving Choice Adoption Services provide legal, medical, psychological
or advisory services in addition to locating an acceptable child
for adoption?
While it is normal to discuss the procedures required for an adoption
with a client in general terms, A Loving Choice Adoption Services is not a
private or publicly licensed adoption agency; an attorney or law firm; a
psychologist; a doctor or counselor. You must seek the needed advice from
licensed practitioners. ALCAS may give you general guidance and direction,
but you must still must rely upon the information and advice provided by
licensed practitioners of your choosing.
How are we selected or "matched"?
A Loving Choice Adoption Services renders its services to a limited number
of prospective adopting Clients at any given time. Therefore, unless
not
appropriate, the birthmother/birthparents will be informed about all Clients
who meet her/their requests as to what type of family she/they would be
seeking for the child (i.e. marital status; whether the adoptive couple will
be first-time parents or not; religion; possibly age; etc.). Be advised that
we do not select the
adoptive couple for the birthmother. It is up to the
birthmother/birthparents of the child to personally select you, and for you
to agree to accept working with her/them toward a successful adoption plan.
When you contract with us, we ask you to provide us with 10-15 copies of
your family profile. A family profile is a 'Dear Birthmother' letter and
pictures
of yourselves, your
other children, your home, your animals, whatever you
choose to show. These
profiles are what the birth families see and what they choose the adoptive
family from. So, you want a nicely done profile. Your
profile should clearly
show yourselves and your lifestyle. Many families have
the computer and/or
scrap-booking skills needed to produce a nicely done
family profile
themselves, however, if you need assistance, or simply prefer
that someone else
perform this service for you, please contact our office.
What will our birthmother and/or birthfather be like?
Well, we have to admit, that in this day
and age, there are not
a whole lot of pregnant
women that are opting for adoption over other
alternatives. In our
opinion, the birthmother/birthparents must be courageous
to choose adoption over
abortion. Carrying a child for nine months and then
giving him/her to another
family to be raised is an incredibly painful and difficult
action. This is a
decision that she/they must live with for the rest of their lives.
We have found that in
order for a woman to plan this and then to carry through with her
commitment, she must have some very motivating factors. Some
examples of motivating
factors can include, but are not limited to, a strong conviction
that this child must have two parents, a traditional family, or perhaps
the mother is in school
and is so ambitious that she will not sacrifice her
education or career for
child rearing. Some birthmothers find it impossible to
raise a child due to
emotional reasons. Whatever their reason may be, we ask
that you not be strongly
judgmental on the choices and lifestyles of
birthmothers or birthfathers. While each situation is different, be
comforted by the fact that
the choice is also yours
to make. By no means do we want you to think that
you would be parenting a
child that you are not capable of parenting because
of drug and/or alcohol
abuse, psychological disorders, or physical
problems.
What about background and medical information on the
birthparents?
After first initial contact we
automatically send out forms to be
filled out and returned
by the birthmother/birthparents. We also request
that the birthmother
send or fax us verification of her pregnancy. While most
birthmothers/birthparents complete and return these forms there are some
that do not. Not
receiving the requested information doesn't necessarily
mean that they are not
committed to the adoption plan. Most attorneys and agencies have their own
forms, which they prefer to use in lieu of our forms.
Every state has
different social and medical requirements to complete the
adoption process. This
information must be gathered by the attorney or
agency from your
birthmother/birthparents. Your legal or agency repre-
sentation is responsible for checking all facts concerning
your birthmother
/birthparents and informing you of your legal rights and risks.
How much will the entire adoption cost us?
The cost of a completed adoption can vary
greatly depending on
the legal and/or agency fees involved; the expenses of the
birthmother, if
any; and where you and the birthmother/birthparents are
located. The
majority of our fee represents the cost of running adoption
advertisements,
and the screening process of all birthmothers /birthparents
resulting from
such advertisements. Some states allow the adoptive family to
support the
birthmother throughout the pregnancy with what are called
"maternity related" expenses. These expenses can include rent, food, utilities,
medical, counseling,
and maternity clothing
among other things. During our initial contact with the birthmother we ask if
she/they have some type of medical/pregnancy
related insurance, and encourage them to seek state aid (i.e. Medicaid)
if they have none.
Statistics show that the average cost of a domestic adoption is around
$15,000. A Loving Choice
Adoption Services has opted to charge you, the
client, a minimal fee in
an effort to keep your total adoption cost within the
national average or
below. A Loving Choice Adoption Services never makes
financial or other
commitments to anyone on your behalf. You are encouraged
to consult with your
adoption attorney and/or adoption agency for direction
about possible
exceptions such as one-time emergency financial aid for food, lodging, and such
in accordance with the laws of the states involved.
If our adoption fails, do we lose all of our money?
The fee you pay to A Loving Choice Adoption Services is for the
service of
attempting to find you an acceptable baby for adoption. There is
no guarantee
that a suitable child will be located or that the adoption court
will approve
the
adoption. If an attempted adoption fails A Loving Choice Adoption Services
will continue to seek a child for you until the contract
period terminates.
While no portion of the contract fee will be returned, A
Loving Choice Adoption
Services will consider extending the term of the
contract on a case by case
basis.
How long does the birthmother/birthparents have to change her
mind after
we have the child?
This varies from state and state; however, we have found that in
most states,
rights can be fully terminated within days of the birth. We
recommend that
you research both attorneys and agencies in your state
before you make a
decision on which to use.
What is an "open" adoption?
Normally in this type of adoption, many adoptive parents and birthparents
share full or partial identities and become personally acquainted
before the
birth. For the birthparents, this can be rewarding as they can
develop
complete confidence in the adoptive parents. This greatly enhances
the
likelihood of placing the baby for adoption as planned. They can also take
pride in their active role of personally selecting the adoptive parents, rather
than relinquishing that role to an agency or attorney. From our experiences,
we encourage that the adoptive family and birthparents share in the delivery
experience. This is definitely a once in a lifetime moment!
| 
